"dammit woman you've turned me gay!"

so this straight guy friend of mine who i've known since high school just told me this in an email today XD

he's always been real cool with gay people and he's a really really sweet guy (who, yes i did have a giant crush on at one point) we talk on FB and try and keep in touch and like the same really nerdy things. but apparently he has a bit of a crush on some adorable boy in one of his classes lol

its cute though because if you know me you know i dont really believe in the whole "there are gay people and there are straight people" i think every straight person has the ability to maybe in a small part of them fall in love (or just lust, or just "OMG SO CUTE!" feelings) with the same gender, and vise versa. now most people who are one or the other never have that moment or find the one person who they're like "OMG WHAT!? WHY DO I FEEL LIKE THIS FOR THEEEEMMMMM!?" about. but a few do...and thats just plain CUTE. *giggles* i'll be honest i always thought he had it in him somewhere, he can be quite femme if he tries XD

ahaha i feel like shit with a pounding headache that wont go away and yet this totally made my day ^_^

i have no social life.

like even LESS of one then i had at CSF. and thats just SAD. i mean come on, at CSF i OCCAISIONALLY went to a friend's room, outside for a concert and ran into friends, sat out on the quad and at least got some sun because it was like two minutes outside my door, sometimes even left campus, and actually had friends who wanted to hang out outside of class.

here? i sit around....in my room.....alone. no one asks me to come over because i dont have friends on campus and my off campus friends have work and/or live far away/have no way we can get anywhere. its sad. my social life has been bottled down to seeing people i'm "class friends" with, in class of course, and every two weeks or so eating lunch with Carol on a wednesday or monday when we both have long breaks between classes. thats. it. thats it. i'm serious, THATS my social life. that and being online. and i have to sit here and listen to my roommates with their friends and going out and doing things and having their fuck buddies over (ok only the bitch does that, the other two just have friends over) and actually having human contact and its driving me fucking crazy.

i cant believe i thought i had no social life at CSF....now i KNOW what no social life feels like. and this time (unlike 4th grade aka the worst year of my life) i dont even have my family to come home to....i have nothing.....nothing but roomies who have their own social lives and ugh!

why does such a stupid conversation with "the bitch" have to make me feel this way!?

"so did you do anything fun over the weekend?"
"no not really, i dont ever do anything fun over the weekend."
"why?"
"because i dont have any friends here?"
"then why did you want to transfer?"
"i didnt."
"ohhhh thats right you had to.....sorry."

after she had been talking about how awesome her weekend had been when she was rock climbing and having fun and not having to be the one who had to stay home so that someone could let in the repair guy to ONCE AGAIN unclog the toilet.

i'm the loser roomie. just.......kill me now?.....or let me go home and never leave? ugh. or...give me some friends?....or one? one NON CREEPY friend. just ONE. thats all i ask for. one non-creepy, normal friend who will invite me over every once and a while to play video games or watch movies or just be losers together. and it would be nice if they had a car.....lol. but seriously....this is all i ask for? how hard can it be? (apparently very! -___-)

i totally just set of the fire alarm...

...in my apartment....i was cooking falafel and the smoking oil kinda got out of hand and then drifted over to the fire alarm XD

EHH EHH EHH EHH EHH

O.O OMG WTF!? D: *runs over to open windows and fan the smoke away from the smoke detector*

loool that was fun XD

and totally worth it. OM NOM NOM NOM FALAFEL! :D

oh another side note: its finally cold enough to wear my lovely hand knitted by YOURS TRUELY socks! :D mmmmm cozy feets!

ugh! i hate my hair right now! >_<

i wanna cuuuuut ittttt.

i need something new, i feel stuck with this haircut and maybe even a change of color....or a semi change of color.

i've been getting back into Yu Yu Hakusho (yes this is relivent, i'm not THAT ADD) and i've been looking at Hiei. i've always felt connected to him and you know...its not like it would be that hard for me to have hair similar to his. i think i might have my starburst be pink though......i dunno.....i just....want something new. i'm tired of this crap.

suggestions? (if anyone even reads this entry XD)

also keep in mind that i want to keep it short if you're going to make a suggestion XD

woooooooow

i was just minding my own business, making myself tea in the kitchen....when.....i heard my roommate, yes the same one i wrote the poem for, getting off.....loudly.

i'm not so sure she realizes how thin the walls are here or maybe she just doesnt realize how LOUD she is....in everything she does.........you know....if she makes noises like that every time.....no wonder she has to sleep with a billion different guys.....i certainly wouldnt wanna hear THAT again XD

wow....that was.....wow.....(when she came home last night from gods know where she spent like ten minutes loudly kissing whichever of her boys she was with this time....she really has no shame....at all)

a poem in honor of my hatred for my roommate.

(not all of the stanzas flow well i know that, suck it i was trying to rhyme!)

Ode to a shitty roommate:

I hate your guts, I hope you know,
That everything you do causes me woe.
You’re a stupid skank, you’ll sleep with anyone.
I don’t know how you seem to be friends with everyone.

I really really wish you didn’t exist
You make the bathroom smell funny, I have to use the air mist.
You sit around with your loud ass friends in the living room,
Talking about things that are disgusting and make me wish upon you, doom.

You turned off my water.
Who the fuck does that!?
You wouldn’t say hi to my father.
I want to beat you up with a bat.

You must have no soul.
It’s the only explination I can think of.
Making my life miserable seems to be your goal.
Yet you somehow think you’re as innocent as a dove.

For such a philosophical person, you’re really a total ditz.
You drink too much beer, that’s why you have the shits.
You have no sense of respect, this I do not understand.
Who the hell, at this age, doesn’t like someone if they don’t know their favorite band?

I think you’re a cunt, I wish you would die.
You make horrible baked goods, I don’t even wanna see how you would butcher pie.
I don’t even have headphones anymore to cancel out your NOISE!
What is it with you and your millions of boys?

You have the most annoying laugh I have ever heard.
Its high pitched and whiny, it would even frighten a bird.
Normally I like when people make up their own philosophy,
But promoting celibacy while being ok with whoring around? Sounds pretty fishy to me.

You actually asked WHY I was with the person I love, because she’s far away?
Are you seriously that jaded? Can you not keep it in your pants?
I’m with her cause I love her, that’s clear as day.
I think I may want to squish you even more than my infestation of ants.

I can tell you this now, I wish you were never born.
Its only been half a semester and already my nerves are worn.
So please listen closely I have something to say:
Stay out of my life, and have a rotten day.


dedicated to the queen of bitches, my roommate. :)

i hate my roomie and wish she would die.

some people sleep at NORMAL hours.....like myself. i'm in bed at the very latest 1:30 SOMETIMES 2:00 in the morning.....now....i know its the weekend....but if you have a roommate who has TOLD you that by midnight they would like to be going to sleep......you dont invite all of your friends over, turn up your music and play some stupid game, loudly, in the living room (that you didnt invite me to play in the first place until i came out of my room to get some water, bitch)

and ok sure when i was like "um yeah no i wouldnt i'm kinda going to bed" she turned off her BLASTINGLY LOUD MUSIC, but her friends are still loud and stupid and laugh really loud (she laughs the loudest, stupid ditz)..............I'M TRYING TO SLEEP! CANT YOU GO TO A FRIEND'S ROOM WHERE THERE ARE NO SLEEPY ROOMMATES!?...............of course there probably are sleepy roommates at all of the other rooms, just that i happen to be the most weenie of all and wont confront people about it. if i see her tomorrow i might suck it up and talk to her about it though. ugh. i kinda LIKE sleep.....OH! OR I SHOULD BE REALLY FUCKING LOUD IN THE MORNING! SEE HOW SHE FUCKING LIKES IT!? *sigh* i cant wait to go home. oh gods bitch i hate you so much why wont you just cease to exist!?

....be careful what i wish for?....

earlier i was wishing for friends. somehow someone out there was listening and magically gave me a friend!...........who is kinda creepy and going to force me to hang out with her when i dont want to XD...or at least try to.

"so what are you good at? what do you do? can i see your art? blagh i'm all up in your personal space!" O.O

she's nice though and doesnt live too far from me...just down the sidewalk, and will go to the store with me! :D

so thats good. ^_^

ahahahahaha i'm a horrible person.

dont you just love it when people you cant stand keep getting fatter and fatter? XD ha ha ha i'm so horrible!

so my CSF arch-nemisis and her boyfriend/completely whipped boy thing keep getting fatter and fatter, as i (yes slowly but still) lose weight. I. LOVE. IT.

ha ha ha Karmic justice maybe? she was after all a total bitch to me. *giggles* this is what you get for eating ice cream every day. (i mean seriously you actually think thats a GOOD idea? O.o?)

ahahaha i feel bad for it but it makes me happy to see their chubby pictures online XD

ha ha ha i love my astronomy professor.

he has the best sense of humor. makes me lol real hard. so today we had a test right? (i was way better prepared for this one, i think i did pretty good! :D) well anyway on alot of the questions that have to do with "one of these things is true about [blah blah]" he has a joke answer thats obviously wrong. so. fucking. funny. here are some of my favorite ones from this test:

1) which of the following is the reason that Venus' temperature is higher than would be expected?

-its rockin' night life.

2) which of these is the reason we dont see as many impact craters on the surface of Venus?

-the Venutians filled them in to trick us.

those are the ones i can remember vividly...i remember there being a funny one on the last question..but now it slips my mind. damn.

on a completely different note. i SWEAR one of my OCs came to life and sat next to me in Astronomy today O.O

he had the same hair as Aedan, he wore the kind of hat Aedan would wear if he wore a hat, green sweater, jeans. i didnt hear him talk so i didnt know if he was Irish or not XD and he had facial hair. but still....freaked me out man, i had a hard time not staring at him like O_____O

lol. he was cute! XD but then again Aedan is cute so that makes sense that i thought that lol.

-EDIT-

oh hells yes! another reason professor Rand is a badass! just got an email about the homework that was due last night. i had wondered about this:

"There is a mistake in the assignment due today. Question 14.7 asks whether Pluto is still the largest object orbiting beyond Neptune. The answer should be False - Eris is thought to be larger than Pluto. However, the answer given is True. I've removed this question from the assignment and alerted, mocked and abused the publishers. Thanks to those of you who caught this and contacted me."

alerted, mocked, and abused the publishers. XD YES! thats exactly what i wanted to do! i was like "BUT BUT BUT BUT ERIS! D:"

pfffff gods he's cool XD the most awesome of nerdy ways!

a few things and a day's thoughts log.

i swear this is a boring campus. i felt like the only queer on campus. i know i cant be the only one cause we've got a QSA thats decent sized and stuff. vtf? also neither of my friends are going to be at the anthropology meeting...so i'm not going, because i'm a weenie. i'll go to the next one. besides, i have a headache.

didnt bring my computer with me so i wrote down a thought log. same format as before. insert lame "captain's log" joke here:

- woke up at a decent hour.....vtf!?

- pretty sure i'm only one of two people dressed for Coming Out Day......Happy Gay Day adorable barista at Satellite who i now this is even more adorable!

-I seriously hope she goes over greek mythology next class. if she doesnt i'mma have to lay on the hurt DX

-western religion =/= only the judeo-christian religions.....spend some more time on the interesting religions dammit! D:<

- Two London Fogs in one day.....i'mma be wiiiiii~iiiiired @_@

- VTF!? Claxons!? are we on red alert!? are the Klingons attacking!? D:

- ok turns out it was just a test of UNMs emergency systems....um...yeah they work.....not that i would have known to do if it was a real emergency.

- HOLY SHIT! omg hi mr. praying mantis....you wanna attack me dont you? aww so cute....i hope you're safe there out in the open D:

- sitting in class an hour before class starts. oh yeah, I'm tat nerdfabulous! :D

~~~~~

i love my random page of OC chibis....so fucking cute XD

i cant stop yawning D:

i'm not even tired, i've had my caffine. vtf is going on!?

anyway. went to the cafeteria today. lol that place scares me XD. not like really scares me but like all the "normal" people eat there and i kinda stand out in my crazy colors that dont match but still (if i do say so myself) look freaking awesome together. anyway, that was fun....found out that there is a cereal and baked goods bar....i didnt realize that. so after i found out how badly they FAAAIIIILLL at making grilled cheese and was still hungry after the potatoes i had (i was feeling too lazy to wait in the eggs line :/) i went and got myself some froot loops and a muffin. i think i might take a bagel or two next time i'm there <_<....>_> shhhhh dont tell anyone.

also....they have banners hanging in there with the dorm names on them....reminded me of the house banners in Hogwarts XD sadly my apartments do not get a banner in there because we're not a dorm, we're apartments. lol still, made me happy.

OH! and with my cereal....they had a choice of soy milk (yay!), whole milk, and 1% milk.....they were out of everything but whole
-___- ugh. so i got just a tiny tiny bit of it in my froot loops just enough to get them a little wet and then ate the froot loops with my fork.....surprisingly easy.

hmmm and another thing: i completely understand and respect the idea behind going trayless, less water to use, helps the environment and all that jazz and yeah i love the environment, i'm as eco friendly as the next weird hippie witch girl (eco nazi roommate excluded, fucking psycho o.o) but trays would REALLY make my life easyier. and by really i mean FUCKING GIVE ME A GODDAMN TRAY! how am i supposed to carry everything with just two hands and no tray!? either give me more arms or give me a tray! *grumble grumble* not fucking cool man, not fucking cool.

*knits away on her blankie* i actually feel like working on it! *gasp!* so yay blankie knitting :D

hmmmm random long pointless entry is random long and pointless.


:]

if you dont plan on paying attention or writing notes, why did you even come to class.

so as i'm sure you all know by now. i fucking love astronomy. pretty much the most interesting class i have ever taken. that being said. i like to pay attention and take notes (and doodle star trek chibis in the sides of my notes <_<..>_>). well today i got to class a little later than usual. (I HAD TO PEE SO BAD!) so i didnt get my usual perfect seat in the second row...someone else took it T^T

so i was sitting in a less than perfect seat in the third row and behind me.....omfg behind me. they. wouldnt. shut. the. fuck. up. i even asked them once. then gave them "THE EYE" two more times....they were....pretty obviously a couple, which is fine, got nothing against that. but they were listening to a shared ipod, doodling, giggling, and flirting for the entire class. if you're not going to take notes, or even listen. 1) how are you going to pass? 2) why are you even in this class?

ok yes i understand that a science lecture and lab are required to graduate and yes i know Astronomy is supposed to be an easy class and yes it is. but really.....some people actually ENJOY learning about planets and moons and other awesome space stuff. so kindly stfu or dont come to class. they even left five minutes early! suuuuch disrespect! omg.

i mean.....i LOVE that class. its my favorite. planets and weird things that cant be explained yet and stars and physics and how the universe works? thats just freaking cool! if i didnt feel like i should be doing some kind of history/science crack baby (oh hello anthroplolgy! :D) i'd probably want to be an astronomer.....and i know there are astronomy majors in the class, has to be. people like them and me are being distracted by these silly freshman who think that its ok to talk while a professor is talking. people need to take notes you know. SOME people find this fascinating...if you dont....go somewhere else because you arent wanted. (they didnt even laugh at the professor's jokes. the guy is funny! i dont know how you cant laugh!)

aaanyway....end of rant.

my shoulder is stiff as hellll D:

but its nice and cool out, i have warm coffee, a banana, a breakfast burrito and chips if i'm still hungry which i prolly wont be so they can be for later :)

oh also! some awesome new things i learned!

Astronomy fact of the day: Saturn has a really really really huge ring that we havent even mapped all of.....info just released yesterday. :D so. freaking. cool.

i'm sick and all i wanna do is knit socks.

but i dont have any sock yarn T^T

i just wanna sit and mindlessly knit myself some socks but no, i dont have any yarn that will work T^T and i have homework i need to do thats due tomorrow. and teacher's to email and all that kinda stuff. *sigh* and i so wanted to go to Astronomy today but my head is so stuffed up that it hurts to stand up and sit back down. i have no idea what walking all that way will do to me T^T

at least this will be the only lecture i've missed. still....poo....but there was no way i was going to get up on time. i'm just now starting to feel KIND OF awake and class is in five minutes :'(

also this damn flu changes its symptoms every day vtf is that? day one: slight throat tickle then a fever at night. day two: nasty cough of doom and chills. and now day three: sneezing, runny nose, stuffy head.

i actually preferred the cough and chills, at least i could walk around without feeling dizzy.

i wonder if i have any decongestants in my first aid kit.

nope. damn. oh well i've got Emergen-C enhanced with Zinc so that might help.

*sigh* i hate being stuffed up, this better not become a sinus infection....YOU HERE ME SINUSES!? I KNOW YOU LIKE GETTING INFECTED BUT NOT THIS TIME!

boooooo.....i guess i should make myself some toast and tea or something :/

(oh and i had another weird ST dream, i was Kirk this time....but i wasnt me at the same time...just Kirk. i dont remember what was going on other then i was in trouble of some kind and Bones was throughly amused because apparently i deserved it XD wtf what did i do?! lol)

WAIT! I DO HAVE SOCK YARN! :D NVM YAY NEW SOCKS! (now should i stripe them or make them a pair thats one green and one blue XD)

weird ass dream last night O.o?

ok so i was Chekov (Anton Yelchin nu!trek version)...but i was also me....and my roommate was Spock (which makes no sense because she's so freaking illogical! D:) anyway it started out that i was making pancakes....or something similar that you fry in a skillet. i was just happily cooking along and then Spock/roomie showed up and i was like "hey i'm making pancakes or vhatever, you vant some?" (yes i had the adorable accent! woo!) and she was like "no. pancakes are illogical." and i was like O.o? because......since when is food illogical? XD (i chalk it up to me not really liking her that much and my brain wanting to make her the enemy XD) anyway i was like *ADORABLE SPACE POUT OF DOOM* and she/Spock was like "meh." and walked off to her/Spock's room. so then i was like....determined to share my pancakes because i had made alot of them in anticipation of sharing them with people (my other roomies never showed up but if i remember correctly they were supposed to be Sulu and Nurse Chapel...from the name tags on their doors) anyway i ended up going outside the room into the hall with my plate of piled high warm pancakes. the hall was kinda like a cross between what the actual hall of the apartments looks like and the halls in the Enterprise (my apartment looked just like it does now) so i was knocking on doors asking people if they would like to share pancakes with me and everyone was either busy, just about to go on shift, or didnt like pancakes (VTF!? who doesnt like pancakes!?) anyway i ended up coming back to my apartment all sad to eat my (still warm lol i love dreams) pancakes by myself but when i got here Kirk and Scotty were in the living room and they were like "Hey Pavel! we've been here waiting to share those pancakes where have you been!?" and i was like "uhhhhhhh......" and then was like "YAY!" and so me and Kirk and Scotty shared my pancakes, the end. XD

oh and Scotty was Devon (but looked like Scotty....though TOS Scotty when everyone else before had been nu!trek) and Mel was Kirk (again TOS, and i have no idea why i made Mel, Kirk XD though i like it.)

tee hee

doing my astronomy homework in a russian accent makes me feel like Chekov....i like it XD

IN SOVIET RUSSIA, SPACE PROBES YOU!

i had fun in Astronomy today.